Firstly, I was wrong about the ‘no bras before 7pm’ rule. Apparently its not a requirement at all, in fact the more free to swing and knock you over, the better. Honestly some of these women could have a mammogram and a pedicure at the same time!
So, back to the revenge of the gods.. We went out for a simply divine dinner to celebrate my mum’s birthday. The restaurant was perfect.. Gazpahco, chateaubriand, crepe suzette and perfect red wine. Alas from that point onward it sort of went downhill..
As it was nearing midnight was we walked into town, one of the party decided it would be really good fun to drag us all into an IRISH ELVIS bar. Now I've nothing against the Irish (apart from the ones that speak like Jim McDonald from Corrie) and I could care less about Elvis, but the two together, combined with a pub where is was the law to chain smoke, have no air con and no ice made me feel as comfortable as a b@stard at a family reunion
I felt myself turning in Karen Walker – “Honey don’t touch me!”
Midnight came, my mother was dragged onto the stage while old Elvis O’Reilly sang ‘Falling in love with you’...how touching...
Having escaped that bar, we then got a cab to another one called Bananas…. yes you can tell by the name that this one is going to be classy... Sure enough it was a chip shop, kebab shop and bar combined into one, complete with outside plastic furniture.
At this point I lost the will to live and WALKED HOME...*
Someone remind me again why I am here and not living it up in London with Alex???????
PS in reference to today’s title, I am trying to have an afternoon nap and some neighbouring kid has a new toy which plays nursery tunes at the same volume as a fat-boy-slim concert. If I hear Merrily we roll along or Baa baa black sheep one more time, I'll swing for it!
* I don’t do walking. I especially don’t do walking up-hill. And I really really don’t do walking up very very steep hills in 80% humidity and 34 degrees centigrade!
TAXI !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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